Dreams pucture reality. [Is the way out, straight through?]
I feel broken without discipline.

Itachi's Letter.

I'm tired of the respons[e]ibilities... there is no future for this soc----... I cannot walk the[ir] path any longer.

Nothing is beyond our total capacity.

How many have forgotten what is most important to them, because they cling to something insubstantial [incomplete and unreal] like their identity and beliefs?

"True change cannot be made if it's bound by laws and limitations, predictions and imagination."

It's foolish to fear the unreal, the unknown, and the inevitable.

How one fails to measure their capacity--to see the depth of reality.

How blinded by time; this psuedo-dreamer's dream ultimately ends one [mis]concept[ion] at a time.

If you open your eyes [your-self] to the truth, the real secret is written there [everywhere].

You too, dear hypo-thesis* can awaken the same >< as he [had].
You too, luminous [and potential] syn-thesis** are neither [limited by] this crude matter nor this fleeting interpretated translation.

(* Hypo- : under-before)
(** Syn- : unity-totality)

Shall no one cross this un-crossable abyss?
And it is dark; time, space, and concept will blur.

"The only way out is through," (a)cross the bottomless abyss.
And it is dangerous, "once open, the door never closes."

No longer fear what you see [past the reflection]...

the boX

our paths crossed
all i could do was walk away
back into darkness

(con-FUSION)
where is my light?
this cage of night,
this fearsome sight,
this lonly height,
this constant fight,
this nearing white.
dear, broken lover,
i see you cry,
and ask you why,
my love can die.

(quest-ion)
why can't i stay?
who calls me away?
what destiny awaits?

// measuring the capacity while mastering all things, beyond these judgements.

the fall of two leaves

(?): arn't you cold?
eXilius: yeah
(?): you shouldn't have worn that
eXilius: it's fine, i'm enjoying it
(?): enjoying what? it's cold!
eXilius: enjoying that sensation, it's really something special... when you think about it
(?): right, i hate the cold
eXilius: what if you didn't get cold?
(?): that'd be great
eXilius: would it? i think you'd be that much more dead... all these things people run from and remove, are they all really simply good/want or bad/avoid?
(?): what are you talking about?
eXilius: it just ... it just sounds like a really empty life... spent... running away from life itself.
::: silence :::

- - -

a thought: Just because someone dares to venture out where you wouldn't dare, does not mean that they don't know how to return (to rest). Often that someone carries tales from beyond the horizon that you crave to digest.

the FORgotten

Curse my mother and bless her still. For blame, truly, she takes heir.
Yet, never forget...her eyes touched mysteries of the unaware...
Beyond veils of perception, a worthless life awaited.
'til her words of fire burned all to ash and set me free [the Avatar]
...born again, born anew, i have awoken.

Warrior, i am. Farewell fear and pain,
and welcome Lonliness, together we travel,
you've never left my side, all of my power came from you...
and welcome Change, the true guardian angel,
you opened my eyes, you taught me truth...
and welcome Death, the only gatekeeper left,
i no longer fear you, i shall choose when...

And what is to be done? ... that I become ...

"ending what had begun, didn't let anyone get in
left with a trace of all that was, and all that could have been"
(--trent reznor)

...and then
I said farewell to all
without hope or reason
and went forth to become
what had always beckoned.

awake while asleep

Within my dreams I'm free, open, awake, and focused. Without my dreams, I'm confined, closed, sleeping, and unfocused. One yin, one yang, both needed to understand the other. I want to merge the realities. I will merge them. Everything coming together to let everything slip away. Losing myself to wake up to what I really am.

It's as thought, the gap between the dream world and the real world creates two contradicting illusions of who and what I am.
In both realities there are aspects that the other doesn't possess. Synthesism is the key. What I am is the combination of both, of all realities, even yours. What I am is nothing, like most things. Most things, not all. Absolutes are a dangerous grip on the universe, on reality.

It's all a riddle--a problem. We are the riddlers--the problem solvers. We riddles ourselves--created the problem. We have the ability to unthink what was thought.

A single word is enough to begin understanding.
But words should be treated like air. Use them to survive but don't look at them, look past them. Past the surface. Deep into their meanings. But never in isolation because everything is connected in this world. Humans to their surroundings, our planet to this universe, words to their sentences, sentences to situtations.